Ok, here’s how this Apple mask thing works.

First of all, it’s made of some space age material we’ve never heard of. There will be talk of Gore-Tex-like membranes, you can breathe through it but it blocks all particles the size of a COVID molecule. There are replaceable filters and no weird air vent. They’ve come up with a design that is decidedly not just the KN95-style triangle everyone else has been fine with — there will be a references to origami and symmetry and how this design maximizes your ability to breathe. It’s just a damn mask like we’ve all gotten accustomed to wearing this year, but it’s distinctly Apple-y and you instantly want one for some reason. They bring back Jonny to talk it up, you never see him wearing one.

The reason Apple is making a mask, though, is because it unlocks your phone. An algorithmic “generative design” is printed on the outside of each mask, “one t r i l l i o n completely unique patterns,” Tim promises. These aren’t QR codes but an entire design system to make each mask uniquely identifiable in combination with your face. Most masks have unique swirls and patterns, some of the designs can only be seen via the infrared camera built into the front-facing “TrueDepth” camera.

You scan a tag on the inside of the mask (it’s not a QR code dammit!) and your phone instantly includes the data for the mask’s pattern in the secure enclave. You can scan as many as you like. When you put the mask on and unlock your phone, it just works.

The masks come in packs of 3 for $40. Replacement filters are sold in packs of 10 for $10. Apple donates all the profits from the masks to Project Red.

Update: Turns out, Apple did design a very Apple-y mask, for their retail employees. See it action.