If girls realized the consequences of sex, nobody would be having sex. Trust me. Nobody.

—

Bristol Palin, who didn’t get to go to prom because she was taking care of her newborn.

While Ross is fomenting spit-up gate, I honestly couldn’t get past this quote. I realize things like “reason” and “faith in science” aren’t highly coveted values in the Palin family, but there are plenty of happy, healthy people the world over who are having happy, healthy sex without unwanted, out-of-wedlock children. It’s a natural, zesty enterprise.